Have you ever heard yourself say:
“But I already told them!”
You told them to clean up.
You told them to put the blocks away.
You told them to wash their hands.
You told them to stop running.
You told them how to get ready for circle time.
And yet…here you are. Telling them. Again.
Here’s the problem:
Telling children what to do is not the same thing as teaching them how to do it.
That distinction is especially important in preschool because so many of the things that seem obvious to us are brand-new skills for young children.
If we want children to become more independent in the classroom, we have to do more than give directions.
We have to teach them how to successfully follow those directions.
Telling Communicates an Expectation. Teaching Builds a Skill.
Preschool teachers give hundreds of directions throughout the day.
“Put your backpack away.”
“Go wash your hands.”
“Choose a center.”
“Clean up.”
“Get ready for circle.”
“Use walking feet.”
We know exactly what each of those directions means.
But our preschoolers might not.
Take a direction as simple as:
“Clean up.”
As an adult, you probably picture children picking up the materials they were using, returning everything to the correct places and moving on to whatever comes next.
But think about all the things a preschooler has to know to make that happen.
They need to know:
- Which materials they’re responsible for cleaning up.
- Where each material belongs.
- How to figure out which container or shelf it goes on.
- Whether they’re supposed to clean only what they used or help with everything.
- What to do if they don’t know where something belongs.
- What the center should look like when they’re finished.
- What they’re supposed to do next.
Suddenly, “clean up” isn’t such a simple direction.
There are a whole bunch of skills hiding inside those two little words.
Adults See the Task. Children Have to Learn the Steps.
The same thing happens with other classroom procedures.
You say:
“Go wash your hands.”
But does the child know where to wait if another child is at the sink?
How much soap should they use?
How long should they wash?
Where does the paper towel go?
Where should they go when they’re finished?
Or you say:
“Go choose a center.”
What does that mean to a child who is brand new to preschool?
Which centers are open?
How do they know?
Can they join a center where other children are already playing?
What happens if the center is full?
What are they supposed to do once they get there?
As adults, we tend to see the completed task.
Children have to learn all of the individual steps that make the task possible.
Sometimes we’re correcting children for skipping steps we’ve never actually taught.
“I Told Them” Isn’t the Same as “I Taught Them”
Let’s say you tell your preschoolers:
“When you’re finished with the blocks, put them back on the shelf.”
That’s a perfectly reasonable direction.
But it isn’t necessarily teaching.
Actually teaching classroom procedures in preschool requires us to make the invisible parts of the procedure visible.
You might take children to the block center and show them exactly what cleanup looks like.
You can point out the labels or pictures that show where different blocks belong.
Then model putting the blocks away.
Let children practice.
Give them feedback.
And practice again later.
Think of it as:
Explain it. Show it. Practice it. Support it.
Because repeating a direction doesn’t magically turn that direction into a lesson.
If a child doesn’t know what you’re asking them to do, saying it four more times—probably getting progressively louder each time—isn’t filling in the missing information.
Sometimes we have to stop telling and start teaching.
We Understand This With Academic Skills
Imagine handing a preschooler a pair of scissors and saying:
“Cut on the line.”
The child tries and absolutely massacres that poor little piece of paper.
Would you immediately assume the child was refusing to follow your directions?
Of course not.
You know cutting is a skill.
A child has to learn how to hold scissors.
They have to practice opening and closing them.
They need to learn how to hold and move the paper.
They have to coordinate both hands.
And they’re going to need lots of opportunities to practice before they can cut accurately.
We understand this when we’re teaching academic and fine motor skills.
But we don’t always apply the same thinking to behavior.
Behavior Is Made Up of Skills, Too
Preschoolers aren’t born knowing how to:
- Wait for a turn.
- Join another child’s play.
- Ask for help.
- Get a teacher’s attention.
- Handle frustration.
- Solve a disagreement.
- Stop playing when cleanup begins.
- Transition away from something they enjoy.
- Use classroom materials appropriately.
These are skills.
And skills have to be taught.
When a child doesn’t demonstrate one of these skills, our first instinct is often to correct the behavior.
But before we correct it again, there’s a question worth asking:
Have I Actually Taught This?
This is one of my favorite questions to ask when a classroom behavior keeps happening.
When you find yourself thinking:
“How many times do I have to tell them?”
Try asking:
“Have I actually taught them?”
Not:
Have I mentioned it?
Did I tell them yesterday?
Didn’t we talk about this at circle time?
Shouldn’t they know this by now?
Instead ask:
Have I explicitly spent time teaching classroom procedures?
Children keep running across the classroom?
Have you actually taught and practiced how children move through your classroom?
Children keep dumping entire tubs of toys?
Have you taught how materials are chosen and used in that center?
Children constantly interrupt you?
Have you taught them what they can do when they need your attention?
Cleanup turns into complete chaos every afternoon?
Have you explicitly taught your cleanup procedure and given children enough opportunities to practice it?
Sometimes the answer will be:
YES. I HAVE TAUGHT THIS.
And they’re still not doing it.
Welcome to preschool.
Teaching something doesn’t guarantee immediate mastery.
Teaching It Once Doesn’t Mean They’ve Mastered It
We don’t teach children to count to ten once and expect them to master counting.
We don’t demonstrate how to write a name on Monday and wonder why children aren’t independently writing their names on Tuesday.
Children need repetition.
They need practice.
They need reminders.
They need support.
And sometimes they need us to reteach.
Classroom procedures and behavioral skills work exactly the same way.
A child may successfully clean up the block center when you’re standing beside them but struggle to do it independently.
A child might know exactly how to ask a friend for a turn during a calm moment but forget every bit of that knowledge when someone has the truck they REALLY want.
Knowing how to do something and being able to consistently do it independently are two different things.
So we:
Teach.
Practice.
Prompt.
Support.
Practice some more.
And then gradually pull back our support as children become more capable.
That’s not a classroom management trick.
That’s how learning works.
Teaching Classroom Procedures Takes Time Up Front
Here’s the part teachers don’t always want to hear.
Teaching all these little classroom skills takes time.
Especially at the beginning of the school year.
It can feel like:
We do NOT have time for this. I have things I need to teach!
But this is something you need to teach.
Maybe it takes ten minutes to teach your preschoolers exactly how markers are used and put away in your classroom.
That can feel painfully slow.
But compare those ten minutes with months of:
“Put the cap on.”
“Where does that marker go?”
“Please put it away.”
“Markers stay at the table.”
“CAP. ON. THE. MARKER.”
Teaching takes more time upfront.
Correction is work you have to keep doing.
The Goal Is Independence
The goal isn’t to create a classroom full of preschoolers who immediately comply with every direction we give.
I want something much more valuable than that.
I want capable children.
I want children who increasingly know how to navigate their classroom without an adult directing their every move.
I want them to know where materials belong.
I want them to know what happens next.
I want them to have strategies for solving small problems.
I want them to know how to get help when they need it.
I want them to be able to participate successfully in their classroom community.
That’s independence.
And we don’t create independent preschoolers by telling them to be independent.
We teach them the skills that make independence possible.
Before You Correct It Again, Ask This
The next time you hear yourself say:
“But I already told them…”
Stop.
Ask yourself:
Did I tell them—or did I teach them?
Maybe you did teach them.
Maybe this child needs more practice, more support or simply more time.
But you might also realize that you’ve been giving the same direction over and over without ever slowing down to teach the little skills underneath it.
And that’s useful information.
Because instead of adding another correction, another reminder or another lecture, you know what you can do next:
Teach the missing skill.
Choose one thing you find yourself constantly reminding your preschoolers about.
Just one.
Ask yourself:
Have I told this—or have I taught it?
Then intentionally teach it.
Show them.
Practice together.
Support them while they try.
And give them time to become independent.
Need Help Teaching Classroom Procedures?
Visuals can be incredibly helpful when teaching classroom procedures—but a visual doesn’t replace teaching.
It’s a tool we use while we’re teaching.
My Visual Procedure Cards break common preschool classroom procedures into concrete visual steps. You can use them to model a procedure, practice it together and then leave the visual support available for children to reference as they become more independent.
Because the goal isn’t for you to spend your entire day reminding children what to do.
The goal is to teach them how to do it.
And if you’re ready to take this idea even further, listen to the next episode:
Want a Calmer Classroom? Teach Routines, Not More Rules.
Because sometimes your classroom doesn’t need another rule.
Your preschoolers need you to teach them what to do instead.
